Friday, September 29, 2006

Big Match Preview: West Ken Kings v Loko

1st October 2006
Barnesalona League, 10.30am KO
West Ken Kings v Lokomotiv Londres FC

General
Julian is away this weekend with Rohan (Pictured) taking charge for the game. Team news is unknown although it is hoped that Roger will return up front. Steve Martin is definitely missing and other than that it should be a similar team to last week. Should the need occur we may be allowed to name up to five substitutes as we have given permission for West Ken Kings to do so.



Last Season Head-to-Head
Loko Wins 1
WKK Wins 3
Draws 0

League
05.02.06 West Ken Kings 1 v 2 Loko (Roger 2) [Match Report]
26.02.06 Loko 0 v 2 West Ken Kings [Match Report]

Cup
18.12.05 Loko 2 v 3 West Ken Kings (James, Own Goal) [Match Report]
29.01.06 West Ken Kings 6 v 1 Loko (Roger) [Match Report]

Stat Attack

- Kings finished last season just the one place ahead of Loko in fourth place. However, they finished ten points ahead of Loko with 35 points, scoring 59 and conceding 40 goals throughout the season. [2005/06 League Table]

- Last seasons 2-1 win against Kings was Loko's first ever victory between the teams. It appears that the ones from the west have an indian sign over us. Although with some good new players this season for Loko, that could hopefully be about to change.

- Loko are currently having a nosebleed topping the table with a win and a draw, while the Kings are eighth with a draw and a loss, although they have had a hard start to the season playing last years champions Uncle Bob's FC (Lost 3-2) and runners up Celtic (Creditable 0-0 draw).

- Each team will for this fixture only be allowed to name up to five substitutions after agreement between the teams.

- Loko are still unbeaten in all Barnesalona competitions since our defeat to Celtic on the 26th March 2006. That is over half a year.

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Player Profile: Peter Masters

Name: Peter Masters
Age: 27
Position: Def RC


Q. What scared you most as a child?
A. Texas Pete off of Superted.

Q. Who did you support as a child and who were you favourite players?
A. The mighty Arse - Mickey Thomas, 1989 season. Since then big Tony Adams. Not only do I model my own play on his but love the fact that now, when he wants a booze or a flutter he plays piano...

Q.What's the funniest thing that has happened to you during a match?
A. I scored a goal.

Q. What's the worst thing anyone has ever done or said to you?
A. Dave saying that my Tournoi goal wouldn't have gone in without the deflection.

Q. What makes you laugh and why?
A. Kavanagh's legs. No explanation needed.

Q. What talent do you wish you had?
A. I dream of being a singer but can't sing.

Q. What is your best physical feature?
A. Soles of my feet.

Q. What do you most dislike about your physical apperance?
A. Inability to grow facial hair.

Q. How do you think other people see you?
A. Unfortunately they tell me fairly regularly and it ain't pretty.

Q. And how do you see yourself?
A. The same.

Q. What do you consider your biggest attribute as a player?
A. Speed/Size combo. Those nippy little b*stard strikers always assume they are gonna accelerate away from me. What do they say about assumptions???

Q. What is your favourite way of relaxing?
A. Crack pipe.

Q. Who do you knock around with from Loko and why?
A. Kavanagh - he lends me money and has a big TV.

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Match Report: Norton 'B' v Loko

Sunday 24th September 2006
London Football Association Sunday Junior Cup

Norton 'B' 7 v Lokomotiv Londres FC 3

Fitness the key in latter stages as Loko go out.

There was not much difference between the sides until the latter stages as Loko's energy levels took there toll in the last 25 minutes.

It started brightly when Dave scored inside the first ten minutes with a crisp finish. Two long range efforts in three minutes turned the match on its head though giving Norton a 2-1 lead. Credit to Loko for battling back and on the half hour mark a James drive hit Dale on the hip and squeezed past the keeper to level the scores.

Unfortunately two quick strikes again just before half time made the score 4-2 and a uphill battle for Loko in the second half.

Half-Time Norton 'B' 4 v Loko 2

Loko did come out fighting and a beauty of a cross by Dave gave James a free header from eight yards out which he superbly powered into the top corner for 4-3. It fell apart in the last twenty five minutes when Loko tired and the opposition, with an average age at least 10 years younger than the Railwaymen, ran away with the game. Three quick goals were enough to take their place in the third round.

All in all a good early season workout for Loko which will improve fitness levels and at times some of the football was excellent. Back to the league next week.

Final Score Norton 'B' 7 v Loko 3

Team Line Up
1. Julian
2. Rohan
3. Ivan
4. Pete
5. Ismail
6. Dave W
7. Dave H
8. Dale (c)
9. James
10. Stefan
11. Nick
12. Steve M (Replaced Ivan 45 Minutes)
13. Paul K (Replaced Ismail 45 Minutes)

Goals
Dave H (1)
10th Minute - A ball was laid across to Dave eight yards out and he side footed it into the bottom corner.
Dale (1)
30th Minute - A James drive deflected off Dales hip past the goalkeepers despairing dive.
James (1)
55th Minute - A beautiful Dave cross was powered from eight yards out into the top corner superbly by James.

Other Cup Results

Our Group
Ladbroke Groovers 0 v Barnes 12
Uncle Bob's FC 2 v Celtic 1

Other Group
Cosmopolitan FC 1 v Hendrix FC 6
South Auckland Rangers 3 v West Ken Kings 4

Match Report and Manager comments to be provided.

Friday, September 22, 2006

Big Match Preview: Norton 'B' v Loko

24th September 2006
London Football Association Sunday Junior Cup, 10.30am KO
Norton 'B' v Lokomotiv Londres FC

General
Loko may have a few players available again this week (although this is not confirmed by the manager), including Ismail, Pete, James and Doug (pictured) for the Sunday morning game against Norton 'B' in the London Junior FA Cup.



Last Season Head-to-Head
Not Applicable.

Stat Attack

- This is the first ever meeting between the two teams.

- Our record in London Football Association games is not very impressive, in 2004 we played in the Veterans Cup losing 7-4 to North West Neasden under floodlights at Edgeware Town FC's stadium. In 2005 an understrength Loko team were taken apart, in the Sunday Junior Cup, comprehensively 6-0 by Europa FC in Enfield Wash.

- Our Record therefore is Played 2 Won 0 Drawn 0 Lost 2 Scored 4 Conceded 13.

- If this match ends in a draw after 90 minutes then 15 minutes each half extra-time will be played. Should the scores still be level at the end of extra time, a penalty shoot-out will commence. This game is ruled according to London Football Association Rules.

- Loko still remain unbeaten since the 2-0 defeat to Celtic on the 26th March 2006, on Sunday that will be 182 days which is exactly half a year, bar half a day. Congratulations boys!

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Player Profile: Alistair Milne

Name: Alistair Milne
Age: 31
Position: Def CL



Q. What scared you most as a child?
A. Homework, something that continued into adulthood.

Q. Who did you support as a child and who were you favourite players?
A. QPR - Alan McDonald especially his great duels with Mark Hughes, and 'Sir'Les Ferdinand. Other Players that stand out were Roy Wegerly, Ray Wilkins, Clive Wilson, Mark Falco and Paul Parker.

Q. What's the funniest thing that has happened to you during a match?
A. Being sick by the side of the pitch due to some dodgy alcohol the night before (that's my story and I'm sticking to it), coming back on and being asked if I'd hurt my knee!

Q. What is the worst thing anyone has ever said or done to you?
A. On the pitch, had the ball smashed into the tenderest area on a man's body, bent over in agony and got shouted at for not tracking back - harsh!

Q. What talent do you wish you had?
A. I would like to be able to play a musical instrument, anyone who dances near me would most likely recommend some dance classes.

Q. What is your best physical feature?
A. My overgrown toe-nails.

Q. What do you most dislike about your physical apperance?
A. My overgrown toe-nails.

Q. How do you think other people see you?
A. Easy going.

Q. And how do you see yourself?
A. In the mirror, occasionally in a lake if the water is calm enough.

Q. What do you consider your biggest attribute as a player?
A. I like to think I read the game well, and am reasonable on the ball for a defender.

Q. What is your favourite way of relaxing?
A. I've recently bought a house with my girfriend and am starting to get into my gardening - how old am I?

Q. Who do you knock around with from Loko and why?
A. I've know Nick for over 20 years from school, and occasionally see Paul the old manager. Julian is my brother so needless to say I see him a fair bit. I also meet up with Adrian to watch his smooth moves with the ladies, and see him at QPR matches where Rohan also puts in the odd appearance.

Monday, September 18, 2006

Match Report: Ladbroke Groovers v Loko

Sunday 17th September 2006
Barnesalona League

Ladbroke Groovers 1 v Lokomotiv Londres FC 8

Eight goals sends Loko top of the League!!!

An exceptional performance from the Railwaymen saw them run out convincing winners in their second game of the season. Unlike Loko of old, the boys shot out of the traps with Dale scoring inside a minute and a half, followed by two Roger strikes inside the first fifteen minutes. Stefan tapped in a fourth and Roger stole one on the goal line for his hat-trick and a 5-0 half-time lead.


(Goalscorers Clockwise from Top-Left: Roger, Dale, Stefan and Dave H)

Roger added two more after the break to take his tally to five, and six for the season after two games. In the last few minutes Peggy ran into the box beating the offside trap and squared the ball for Dave H to tap home from six yards. A messy last minute goal for Ladbroke spoiled what was almost a perfect performance from Loko.

Next up is the London Football Association Sunday Junior Cup next week at the National Westminster Bank Sports Ground just south of Streatham off the A23, against Norton 'B'.

Manager Julian Milne's comments:

"Well done to everyone for a strong performance. It is worth mentioning that everyone was pretty much on time and we were able to warm up properly. Organisation is important at this level, and it showed when we started brightly and scored two good early goals. That set the tone for the whole game and I thought some of the performances were very strong.

Our work rate was good, we closed the oppostion down well. Everything is in place for a good season and I hope the squad keeps to the high standards it set itself on Sunday. Well done."

Team Line Up
1. Julian
2. Adrian
3. Ivan
4. Nick
5. Rohan
6. Dave W
7. Dave H
8. Dale
9. Stefan
10. Roger (c)
11. Stephen (Peggy)
12. Steve M (Replaced Rohan 60th Minute)
13. Paul K (Replaced Adrian 60th Minute)

Other League Results
Barnes 1 v Uncle Bob's FC 1
Celtic 0 v West Ken Kings 0
Real Madras FC 1 v Hendrix FC 2
South Auckland Rangers 4 v Cosmopolitan FC 2

Friday, September 15, 2006

Big Match Preview: Ladbroke Groovers v Loko

17th September 2006
Barnesalona League, 10.30am KO
Ladbroke Groovers v Lokomotiv Londres FC

General
Loko this week welcome back into the fold Pete Masters and Dale Mellor (both pictured) for the Sunday morning game against Ladbroke Groovers, thereby further strengthening the defence and midfield after last weeks encouraging start to the season. There is a possibility that Paul Dwinfour may make an appearance for this fixture.



Other than this the squad appears to be the same as last week.

Last Season Head-to-Head
Loko Wins 2
Ladbroke Groovers Wins 0
Draws 0

League
20.11.05 Loko 5 v 0 Ladbroke Groovers (Andreas 3, Dale, Pete) [Match Report]
09.04.06 Ladbroke Groovers 2 v 3 Loko (Roger, James, Ismail) [Match Report]

Stat Attack

- Ladbroke Groovers is the new name of last years team, 'Said'.

- The Groovers have a notable ex-Loko contingent playing for them including the manager Said and playmaker Nordine.

- Ladbroke's victory on the opening day of this season was their first since the 5th March 2006 and only their third ever Barnesalona League win.

- The Groovers have scored 8 goals already this season and top the table after week one, whereas they only managed 35 goals in the whole of last season.

- Loko only conceded 41 goals last season compared to 110 by the Groovers.

- After last weeks solid 1-1 draw with Auckland, Loko are still unbeaten since the loss to Celtic on the 26th March 2006.

- This will be only the third competitive meeting between the two teams.

Monday, September 11, 2006

Match Report - South Auckland Rangers v Loko

Sunday 10th September 2006
Barnesalona League

South Auckland Rangers 1 v Lokomotiv Londres FC 1

Barnes-Barrington and Hazig star in entertaining Curtain Raiser.

For the first time in over 100 years, Loko managed to avoid defeat in their opening game of the season, being held to a 1-1 draw by a resurgent South Auckland Rangers. Roger Barnes-Barrington scored Loko’s goal and had a second disallowed, while Ismail Hazig put in a man-of–the-match performance at centre-half. The two new signings, Peggy and Dave ‘Whitaker’ Lineker slotted straight in with impressive debuts in what was an even match played in a good spirit.

Call me a pessimist, but when notorious slow starters Lokomotiv took to the field in the hot sunshine, lacking match fitness, their key centre half and their most influential central midfielder, against a team that had perhaps a two-inch per man height advantage… defeat seemed to beckon with that familiar bony finger. Despite having a good record against Auckland, the return of key players to the Kiwi line-up and the absence of the same from the Steam-Driven Eleven meant that Loko began the game as underdogs.

Clement weather and a spirit of optimism abounded at Barn Elms, with the new season promising much, including a dashing new team: Nellie’s Rangers. All involved with Barnesalona hope that the troubles of last season have been put to bed. Loko, with Roger as captain, kicked off on sloping pitch two with the advantage of playing downhill, but with the sun in their eyes. The opening few minutes saw a number of careful passes between the Loko players that were straight off the training ground, as they attempted to conserve not only possession but also their energy.

After a short while though it was Auckland who began to press, using their pace and strength to stretch the scratch-built Loko back four of Nick, Rohan, Ismail and Ivan. Although the defence was at times creaking it never buckled; Auckland failed to take advantage of the lack of height Rohan and Ismail offered at centre-half, preferring to play balls into the channels, where they were cleared up by Nick and Ivan, who both had great games.

Auckland did win a series of corners but failed to threaten. Whenever the ball was played into the centre it was on the ground where it was easily cut out by a rampaging Ismail. The closest that the Kiwis came to taking the lead was when Jules out-jumped his man to clear, only to see his glancing header bounce a whisker wide of his own goal.... a narrow escape for the signalmen, and a stroke of good fortune to boot.

However there was nothing lucky about the save that Steve M made moments later; an Auckland attacking throw fell to a striker in the box, whose shot on the turn was parried brilliantly at his near post by the Loko keeper. Meanwhile, despite playing downhill, the team in blue were restricted to attacking on the break. The method of choice was to play balls into the channels for Roger and James to chase, but no clear sightings of goal came their way. Half time came with both satisfaction at having kept Auckland out and foreboding at having to play uphill with weary legs for a further forty-five.

Half-Time South Auckland Rangers 0 v Loko 0

In the event though, the next twenty-five minutes proved to be Loko’s best of the game. The midfield took control with short passing and running, particularly from Dave and Peggy on the wings. Dave W was winning everything in the air and on the ground, and Roger began to hold up the ball in his trademark style, creating space for James and Peggy who were running off him.

Before Loko found the net both James and Dave went close, first the former sent a curling shot just wide of the post, then the latter bent a free kick around the wall but into the keeper’s arms. To whet the crowd’s appetite Roger gave a preview of his goal, as he muscled shoulder-to-shoulder past the centre-half before planting his shot in the bottom corner, only to be halted mid-celebration by the referee, who had given the foul against him.

Not to be denied, though, Loko made good use of the airspace above Barn Elms – a nod to Tony Cinzano – to finally open the scoring with about an hour gone. Jules, who had replaced Steve M in goal to make room for Adrian in midfield, pumped a kick so high that Dezza caught sight of it from Bramall Lane; when it finally fell to earth Auckland failed to deal with the bounce which allowed Roger to run through and once again stroke his favourite shot into the bottom left corner, sparking wild scenes in the stands.

As the second half wore on Auckland started to get the measure of Loko once more and the attacks began to stream down the hill past tiring Loko legs with greater frequency. The Loko full backs were having to chase back ceaselessly, and were replaced by Paul Kelly and Doug for the final 25, to keep the defence fresh.

The Kiwis however lacked a player who could really cause havoc by beating his man, and the directness of their attacks played somewhat into Loko’s hands. Jules had to be on his toes with ten minutes to go though, as the ball broke to an attacker on the edge of the box and he hammered a shot towards the roof of the net; the player-manager was equal to it however, tipping the ball over with an acrobatic save at full stretch.

Towards the end the Loko tackling became ever more ragged and desperate, resulting in, to quote Otto Rehhagel, a ‘festival of free kicks’ around the Loko area being awarded to Auckland. From the last of these the equaliser arrived; for once the Kiwi attacker rose above his man to flick the ball on at the near post, and Loko were second best again when the striker reacted faster than the defence to bundle the ball home.

The final minutes passed with both teams looking to win but with no clear chances, and when the whistle blew there were immediate handshakes all round. The Loko players were frustrated, both at the disallowed goal and at having come close to an opening-day victory, but on the balance of play a draw was the right result. A solid display and two strong debuts represented a happy start to the campaign.

Final Score South Auckland Rangers 1 v Loko 1

Manager Julian Milne's comments:

"A good start to the season. Lovely weather and a tight, competitive match. Particularly pleasing was the defensive performance. It was the first time I had played that back four in the absence of Peter and Paul. We didn't concede too many chances and could easily have kept a clean sheet if it hadn't been for some rather 'soft' free kicks awarded by the ref around the box.

Obviously both teams were a bit rusty but I thought the quality of football was decent. Auckland seemed much improved from the team that finished last season and the game was played in a really good spirit which is always a plus.

I was disappointed that we conceded a goal from a set piece and this is obviously something we should address before the next match. If you lose a header on the edge of the box and then let the ball run right across the face of the goal you are obviously asking for trouble. But mainly positives and in what promises to be a very open league it gives us something to build on.

Encouraging performances from both the new lads (Peggy and it seems now 'Lineker') as well as some premium stuff from a couple of the legends - Ismail and Ivan.

Also a mention to Roger who took the armband and led from the front, encouraging the other players at just the right times.

Man of the match: Ismail."

Team Line Up
1. Steve M
2. Nick
3. Ivan
4. Ismail
5. Rohan
6. Dave W
7. Dave H
8. Julian
9. James
10. Roger (c)
11. Stephen (Peggy)
12. Adrian (Replaced Steve M 60 Minutes)
13. Doug (Replaced Ivan 65 Minutes)
14. Paul K (Replaced Nick 65 Minutes)

Goals
Roger (1)
55th Minute - A high ball wasn't dealt with by the Auckland defence and Roger brought the ball down, ran through on goal and hit it low in to the bottom corner.

Match Report provided by Rohan Tesh.

Other League Results
Barnes 0 v Real Madras FC 4
Celtic 1 v Hendrix FC 0
Ladbroke Groovers 8 v Cosmopolitan FC 3
West Ken Kings 2 v Uncle Bob's FC 3

Friday, September 08, 2006

Big Match Preview: South Auckland Rangers v Loko

10th September 2006
Barnesalona League, 2pm KO
South Auckland Rangers v Lokomotiv Londres FC

General
The season kicks off for Loko with a couple of notable absentees from last season, it appears that our goal machine Andreas has relinquished the number 10 shirt and this will be up for grabs by the likes of Mark Bullock, Stefan Butler and James Kavanagh. Other missing players include Steve Whitely, Johan, Paolo and Samer.

The other absentees on the opening weekend will be Pete Masters (pictured) and Dale Mellor who are both unavailable for this fixture. It is also rumoured that Paul Dwinfour may also be unavailable but this is yet to be confirmed.

Last Season Head-to-Head
Loko Wins 2
Auckland Wins 1
Draws 1

League
18.09.05 Auckland 1 v 3 Loko (Andreas 2, Christophe) [Match Report]
30.10.05 Loko 1 v 3 Auckland (Paolo) [Match Report]

Cup
23.10.05 Auckland 2 v 2 Loko (Andreas 2) [Match Report]
08.01.06 Loko 2 v 0 Auckland (Win by default) [Match Report]

Stat Attack

- Loko finished last season just above half way in fifth place with 25 points from 18 games.

- Auckland ended in the bottom half of the table, finishing eighth with 18 points from 18 games.

- Loko scored 42 goals in league competition compared with 33 for Auckland.

- Loko also had the meaner defence conceding 41 goals as opposed to 52 goals conceded by Auckland. [2005/06 League Table]

- Loko have been undefeated in the league for one game, with their last defeat taking place on the 26th March 2006 in a 2-0 defeat to Celtic.

- Auckland are on a run of four straight defeats in league competition, with their last win being a 4-2 victory against Barnes way back on the 26th February 2006.

Player Profile: James Kavanagh

Name: James Kavanagh
Age: 33
Position: Mid RCL / Att Mid RCL / Att RCL


Q. What scared you most as a child?
A. My bed being under the bloody monsters.

Q. Who did you support as a child and who were you favourite players?
A. I have always been a Liverpool fan. Jan Molby is my favourite ever Liverpool player.

Q. What's the funniest thing that has happened to you during a match?
A. I was playing in a charity match, raising funds for Grrenpeace, we used George Bush's head as a ball... that was fun.... oh hang on, that was also a dream.

Q. What's the worst thing anyone has ever done or said to you?
A. I was accused of being unkind to dwarfs... which is ridicilous. I always point behind their back. They never know I am doing it.

Q. What makes you laugh and why?
A. Pointing at Dwarfs.

Q. What talent do you wish you had?
A. Being able to body-pop.

Q. What is your best physical feature?
A. My water-feature.

Q. What do you most dislike about your physical apperance?
A. The two growths hanging from my water-feature.

Q. How do you think other people see you?
A. As the only candidate left alive who could be the messiah.

Q. And how do you see yourself?
A. As a serial killer of potential messiahs.

Q. What do you consider your biggest attribute as a player?
A. If given time, space, a good playing surface, a quality ball, a wicked pair of boots, the right wind-speed, I will definitely get at least a third of my shots on target.

Q. What is your favourite way of relaxing?
A. Dwarf -pointing with friends.

Q. Who do you knock around with from Loko and why?
A. Nick, Pete and I have started a dwarf-pointing club. I never knew there were people out there that felt the same as me.

Friday, September 01, 2006

September Fixtures 2006

Sunday 10th September 2006
Barnesalona League
Pitch 1
South Auckland Rangers v Lokomotiv Londres FC

Result: Drew 1-1

Sunday 17th September 2006
Barnesalona League
Pitch 1
Ladbroke Groovers v Lokomotiv Londres FC

Result: Won 8-1

Sunday 24th September 2006
London Football Association Sunday Junior Cup
National Westminster Bank Sports Ground, Norbury
Norton 'B' v Lokomotiv Londres FC

Result: Lost 7-3