Age: 28
Position: Gk / Mid CL / Att Mid CL (Manager)
Q. What scared you most as a child?
A. Player Profiles.
Q. Who did you support as a child and who were you favourite players?
A. Queens Park Rangers. Sir Les and Andy Sinton. Met Andy Sinton when I was mascot for QPR v. Manchester City. We lost 3-1, Paul Parker got sent off for the first (and I think only) time in his career and Simon Barker broke his leg (every cloud...), so not the luckiest. Our official mascot was a black cat that brought us good fortune for many years until it got run over the year we got relegated and went into administration. I wasn't driving the car...
Q.What's the funniest thing that has happened to you during a match?
A. There are many to chose from if you have been a Loko player for several years...
Before we joined the league we participated in the 2001-2002 Barnesalona cup competition. I remember the opposition scoring a blatantly offside goal only for the ref, on this occasion playing for the opposition and in fact the goalscorer, to decide it (he) was in fact onside before reeling away in celebration. Uhmmmmmmm.
Others of note:
- Loko losing 23-1
- Nigel's warm up
- Being sent off for asking the ref to stop ruining our matches by flashing his cards all over the place (I think the irony was lost on him, although Rohan and Dale telling him to F**K OFF and giving him the two finger solute did register. We were reduced to 8!)
Q. What's the worst thing anyone has ever done or said to you?
A. I got head-butted in Paris and broke my nose. My only consolation being that I didn't then start shouting 'I am having a baby in two weeks!'
Q. What makes you laugh and why?
A. The legend that was the previous club captain Paul Dwinfour doing squat thrusts. Sorry Paul... ...no explanation needed!
Q. What talent do you wish you had?
A. I wish I could rap like Robbie Williams.
Q. What is your best physical feature?
A. Some people say I look a lot like Robbie Williams, maybe it is just wishful thinking but I like to believe it sometimes when I am rapping in front of the mirror.
Q. What do you most dislike about your physical apperance?
A. My third nipple simply has to go.
Q. How do you think other people see you?
A. Other people see me as the Robbie Williams of goalkeeping. No one else is going to score when I am in town.
Q. And how do you see yourself?
A. I see myself as a Western European Jan Stejskal.
Q. What do you consider your biggest attribute as a player?
A. My biggest attribute as a player - my reflexes (when in goal), my stamina (when outfield).
Q. What is your favourite way of relaxing?
A. I like a good game of tournament poker.
Q. Who do you knock around with from Loko and why?
A. My Loko buddies are Rohan and my brother Ali, Adrian down at Loftus Road cheering on the fledgling hoops and for the occasional drink. Occasionally play 5-a-side with Pete and James which is always a good laugh.
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