Age: 31
Position: Def RCL / Mid RCL
Q. What scared you most as a child?
A. Wolves. The animal, not the team. Foxes. The animal, not the team. Owls. The animal, not the team.
Q. Who did you support as a child and who were you favourite players?
A. Liverpool, Ian Rush. I wasn't very imaginative. I'm still not.
Q.What's the funniest thing that has happened to you during a match?
A. Misjudged the bounce from a goal kick and learnt the other definition of "ball control". It wasn't funny at the time. Actually, it's still not.
Q. What's the worst thing anyone has ever done or said to you?
A. I'm not sure, but certainly the worst thing anyone has ever said to anyone else in the history of the world ever ever ever is that they went around sniffing dog turds. Most heinous.
Q. What makes you laugh and why?
A. Someone else experiencing the other definition of "ball control" just because it's not me.
Q. What talent do you wish you had?
A. I wish I could cross the ball properly. And I wish I could run up the pitch to attack then back down to defend several times without wanting to vomit.
Q. What is your best physical feature?
A. My mane of hair gives me the strength & skill of the legendary Samson. Kenny Samson, that is.
Q. What do you most dislike about your physical apperance?
A. My mane of hair because I can rarely see where I'm going.
Q. How do you think other people see you?
A. Quiet but reliable.
Q. And how do you see yourself?
A. Quiet but reliable.
Q. What do you consider your biggest attribute as a player?
A. I'm flexible and can play in several positions (I think I played in 8 different positions last season).
Q. What is your favourite way of relaxing?
A. Call me crazy, but I find sleep a good way to relax.
Q. Who do you knock around with from Loko and why?
A. I was at school with Ali and we've known each other for over 20 years. Plus, always a bonus, I don't have to pay him much to be my mate.
